TBT -- More Monkey Pictures

Welcome to Throwback Thursday -- blog style!  This post originally ran on December 13, 2012.  Here you can see why we finished our basement the way we did!

More Monkey Pictures

As promised ... more Alan monkey pictures!

See the plywood on the left side?  That is to protect
wires and copper tubing that he was trying to
use to climb.  Thank goodness DH is handy!

scaling the support pole ...
the kid has "monkey toes"

Climbing up the basement banister
Note it is now a 2"x4" because he
broke the original banister

I love that he does this with a DVD box in
his hand.  He can go all the way from
the basement to the main floor without
touching the actual stairs!

trying to climb through the deck stairs
... he didn't fit!

Squeezing into a cubby in the basement

Another tree he likes to climb at his
aunt's house ... several people
observed that the statue is probably
watching over him!

The kid's flexibility is amazing!

My BIL commented that he looks like the
vulture on Snoopy's doghouse!

More balance beam work

High up in the tree

He had been trying to climb the shelves in his closet.
Note: the bottom left clothes bar has already been
removed ... so have the closet doors but that was
years before!

Somehow he managed to shimmy up on the shelf

crawling across for variety

not sure how he got up there in the first place

oh, maybe like this!

Doesn't everyone relax on top of the monkey bars?

  

just hanging out

Inside he also resorts to bed burrowing

Stair diving ... headfirst on his back!

Hiding in "the tunnel" as he calls it

What have I done?

Alan is going away to camp next week.  It will be for FIVE days.  I am having a minor panic attack about it.  The only time Alan has been away without family overnight was one camp weekend.  Every other time, at least Joe was with him.

What have I done?

He can't tell me if he's miserable.  He can't tell me if they mistreat him.  He can't tell me if he's having the time of his life and wants to go every week next summer.  He can't tell me anything about it.  Oh and he's three hours away from home -- his weekend camp is 30 minutes away.

What have I done?

I know the camp has a good reputation.  Lots of kids go each week (about 150) and they've been in operation for years.  He will get to be outside and probably climb trees to his heart's content.  But what if they won't let him climb trees?  How will he communicate his problems?  Heck, half the time I have no clue why he's upset.  How the heck is a stranger going to figure out the problem?

Well, he's gone to assorted schools since he was 3.  I was never there.  He did just fine.  Most of the dedicated professionals who have worked with him have been fantastic.  They aren't in this field for the money.  They are in it for the kiddos.  Of course the bad apples get all the press so that is what has me stressed.

In reality he will probably have a blast.

I am looking forward to painting his room (it has been probably 8 years since I painted it!) and maybe just having a little "me" time.

Joe is counting the days until little brother leaves.

DH will take a a day or two of vacation and we have some fun evenings planned.

We are all looking forward to five straight nights of sleeping through the night!

What have I done?

I've arranged for a week away for all of us.  As Thomas the Tank Engine says, "Sometimes a change is as good as a rest." 

Here's to a week of change!

TBT - My Monkey

Here is my Throwback Thursday blog post -- My Monkey -- which originally ran on December 12, 2012 (when I'm pretty sure I had zero readers!)  Enjoy the pictures!

My Monkey 

Several times I have referred to the fact that Alan climbs EVERYTHING, but as they say a picture is worth a thousand words, I thought I would share a few favorites ...

Doesn't everyone climb monkey bars like this?

Or this?

Love the hands in the pockets!  Mr. Cool!

The tree is popular too!

He learned how to shimmy
up the side of the A-frame

Although watching him balance
on the top was the most
nerve wracking!

Playground equipment is fun, too!

Perching

Who needs stairs when you can
climb through the banister?

Once again, the hands are in the pockets.
The neighbors all love to watch him.

These are all from 2011.  Tomorrow I will post some from this year and they are even funnier.  That kid!

Writer's block

I have a really bad case of creativity block.

Some of this is certainly the fact that summer is here.  I have never been a big fan of warm weather.  Alan is home more and DH is currently on a business trip.  Sigh.

I haven't done much recently with my minis.

I've hardly even cooked much in my new kitchen.

I haven't written anything recently on this blog of which I am particularly happy.  Father's Day is coming up and I haven't even written a good tribute to DH.

So, since today is Thursday, I will take advantage of TBT and re-run my tribute from last year which is probably one of my all time favorite posts anyway.  So Happy Father's Day, DH!

Happy Father's Day, DH!

As regular readers know, I do not refer to my hubby by name, merely as DH.  Lest anyone be confused that does stand for Dear Husband NOT D*%# Husband.

The young and the clueless

DH and I met some 25 years ago and it wasn't exactly love at first sight.  We both thought the other had some goofy traits -- I was concerned about silly things like whether or not his clothes matched (they didn't) and he thought I needed to grow up (I did).  Obviously we did eventually reconcile these little problems.

So fast forward some seven years to Joe's birth.  I know that DH and I were terrified.  I would be hard pressed to say who was more so.  We were both the youngest in our family and although we both had nieces, we really had very limited experience with kids in general and babies in particular.  

We both have a vivid memory of leaving the hospital, getting out to the car with Joe and wondering how the heck did we get the car seat in the car?!?!?!   I am positive that he was not properly restrained for that first short drive.  Then there were diapers.  I think I had changed a grand total of two diapers before Joe was born and I'm pretty sure DH hadn't even changed that many.

I'm sure anyone who has ever cared for a newborn remembers that dreaded "transition" diaper.  That's the one with the consistency, color and smell of rancid tar.  We got Joe's at about 3 in the morning on his first night home.  While trying to clean it up (which took two of us) we were both christened along with the wall and floor of Joe's room -- ah, the special joys of little boys.  I was in so much pain from trying to breastfeed and a difficult birth that all I wanted to do was cry but DH just laughed which made me laugh and like so many things that would come later, he helped me get through.

Joe wasn't always an easy baby.  He would make himself go rigid and thrash like there was no tomorrow, but like many with autism he was the world's cutest toddler.  However, he only had about 10 words until he was almost 3 when we started our own version of ABA so he was definitely a challenge!

DH was always fantastic about coming with me to doctor after doctor and school meeting after school meeting.  I remember when we had home ABA with Joe and DH would make it to most of the team meetings.  Our ABA coordinator told us she didn't even know what most of the dads looked like and here was DH sitting in and contributing in most of the meetings. 

He would take Joe to the pool, the playground and even built a swing-set for him.  (And 14 years later, that swing-set is still in use by the younger child.)  But Dad and Joe are still pals and play tennis, chess and go for bike rides.

But I think what I like best about DH as a father is that he was never upset about the fact that Joe didn't play conventional sports.  We tried both t-ball and soccer when he was younger and they were complete disasters.  But it was never an issue.  I know so many guys that want to live vicariously through their male off-spring and DH was never that way.  He happily took Joe to gymnastics and later piano and bowling.  He taught him how to play tennis and we both taught him to ride a bike (with DH doing more of the running than yours truly!)

He also liked just relaxing and being silly with Joe.

Although he had a little denial before Joe was diagnosed he probably had less than me with Alan.  I was just convinced that lightning did NOT strike twice.  Alan was such a different baby than Joe -- cuddly, amazing eye contact, lots more babbling -- that I did not think he could possibly have autism. 

But once again, with DH's fantastic sense of humor and help, we got through all the sleepless nights, the poop smearing, the B-12 shots in Alan's butt while he slept, the bizarre climbing, the endless "Alan-proofing" of the basement, etc.  

The poor guy even has allergies but when Joe wanted a cat, DH said sure. 

And DH still has some of the ickier jobs with the boys.  He usually ends up taking Alan to the sedation dentist because it takes two males (DH and the doc) along with three nurses to hold him down and give him the initial shot.

And through all this, he remains my best friend and the person most likely to make me laugh.  Overall I couldn't ask for a better husband or Dad to my boyz!  

Love you, babe!

Guerrilla warfare or why I appreciate teachers

As a mom to special needs kiddos, I guarantee you that I appreciate teachers more than your average parent -- even more than a parent who happens to teach.  I love my boyz but some days (especially Sundays), I tend to count the hours until Alan returns to school.  It is just emotionally draining at times.  I am unbelievably cut off from family and friends.

Even though I have teenagers, I can't leave them alone in the house for even the half hour it would take to run to the grocery store.  I have been known to put a video on for Luke and run up to the grocery store to pick up milk or prescriptions and I am wracked with guilt the entire time.  What if he climbs somewhere he is not supposed to climb?  What if he falls and hurts himself?  What if he opens a window and climbs out on the roof?  The first two have happened repeatedly and although the last one hasn't happened (yet) it is certainly within the realm of possibility.

Now that Joe is driving, I can at least send him to the store, but there are certain things he is not capable of doing.  He won't use our medical flexible spending card.  He certainly will not look for the best deal when it comes to picking out soup, crackers, eggs, apples, etc.  He won't buy any sort of produce unless it is something he will eat.  Even though I have tried to show him how to pick out assorted veggies and meats, he is not comfortable buying them.  Luckily I have some pretty fantastic neighbors who have been known to share an egg or an onion occasionally.

As always, DH helps immeasurably.   But one of us always has to be on "Alan duty".  24/7/365  So when DH has to work on the weekends (it happens when you work for a utility!), or wants an afternoon off to work out, play a game with friends or even go see a movie by himself, that means I am on duty.  Don't get me wrong, I do NOT begrudge him that time, just like he does not begrudge me the time I spend on miniatures during the school days.  We both need that time "away".  But for the person responsible for Alan, it is "duty".

In many ways dealing with Alan is like guerrilla warfare.  According to Wikipedia, "Guerrilla warfare is a form of irregular warfare in which a small group of combatants such as armed civilians or irregulars use military tactics including ambushes, sabotage, raids, petty warfare, hit-and-run tactics, and mobility to fight a larger and less-mobile traditional military."

That pretty much sums it up.  Alan ambushes, sabotages, fights petty battles and is infinitely more mobile.  DH and I are still larger (albeit not for much longer), less-mobile and traditional.

Most of our "battles" are small.  But they are frustrating.  Sunday morning Alan was whiny.  I didn't know if the lack of structure was starting to get to him or what.  Finally in desperation I gave him an ibuprofen early in the afternoon.  Guess what?  He calmed down and was a doll the rest of the day.  Poor kid.  Something was hurting on him, but he couldn't tell me what.  All I had to go on was a whiny kid.  Very frustrating!

But all these little things only highlight why I appreciate teachers.  Teaching is truly a vocation.  At the start of summer vacation, I am sitting here appreciating his teachers every moment.

TBT - Mischief Mode

Ha!  I found this post when I was looking for my TBT (Throwback Thursday) post and had to laugh.  This post originally ran during Spring Break of 2013.  Today is the start of "summer vacation" for Alan.  Of course, in reality he starts summer school next Monday so it is only a few days, but I could totally relate to this anyway.  We also have the fun of a haircut scheduled for tomorrow -- DH is taking a half day of vacation to help us break this rut.  Say a prayer that it will help.  Have a great weekend, readers!

Mischief mode

By the time Spring Break is over for the boys, I will probably weigh 300 pounds.

 
I'm a "stress" eater.  I've always known this.  When I am blissfully happy, I forget to eat.  For some unknown reason I haven't done that in years. 

This week is especially tough because all Alan wants to do is go out to eat lunch -- and we all know that fast food is sooooooooo good for you.
 
Meanwhile, Alan no longer likes to go to the zoo or the park or anything remotely like this.  So after taking him out to lunch, he climbs and gets into mischief and I eat.  And it is only Wednesday. 

DH was hoping to take a few days off work to help me out but he is having problems and vacation isn't a great thing at the moment.  We are still hopeful that will change tomorrow or Friday.

We had to get rid of all our home workout equipment because Alan liked to climb on it (that is a bit hard on an elliptical or a weight machine) and so I don't have any easy way to work out here at home.

I had some faint hopes before Spring Break that I could race up to the gym and do a fast workout and leave Joe in charge of Alan but unfortunately for that plan, Alan has been in mischief mode this week.

Alan knows what he is allowed to do outside.  Really, I think we are pretty darn lenient about that but we do draw a few lines.

We do not allow him to climb on the neighbors' swing set.  While he is unlikely to fall, 160 lb kid could easily break something.  And, if he does fall and hurt himself, I am sure they would come up with some way to sue us for that.

We also do not allow him to climb over our deck rails.  We have reinforced all the rails but still don't think that is a good thing.  We also don't allow him to climb the siding of our house.  And yes, he has tried to do all of these things especially when he gets in mischief mode.

He is actually sort of entertaining to watch when he gets into mischief mode.  He goes outside and looks over his shoulder to see if I am watching.  When he sees that I am, he happily walks over to the tree or the swing-set and climbs and plays.  Then he casually glances over his shoulder and studies the sliding glass door and any of the windows in which he has seen me watching him.  If he doesn't spot me he scampers off to one of the places he knows he's not allowed to climb and starts climbing.

Yesterday was a fairly pleasant day so I figured I would take my book and read outside while he climbed.  That worked for awhile and then I went inside and as soon as I went away from the windows to do something mundane like laundry or dishes, he struck!  I came back to find him hanging on the railing from the outside of our deck.  Grrrrrrrrr

After a time out, he wanted to go outside again so I followed him out with my trusty book.  I got a deck chair set up and ... he decided to go back inside.  I put away the deck chair and followed him and ... he decided to go back outside so I followed him and then he gave up and decided to play inside for a little while.  Thank goodness for small favors. 

Of course, being inside makes it easier for me to eat.  There is always a downside.

Our Redneck Home Improvement or How I Spent My Christmas Break

I sit here late on New Year's Day and I am exhausted but it is the good kind of exhausted that comes from accomplishment.  DH and I got so much accomplished during the last 3 days it isn't even funny.

First off, a little background.  I haven't blogged in ages.  Prepping for Christmas, Alan off school and just the day to day challenges have left me with little time and no inspiration.  We had a good Christmas -- very simple -- and there were no meltdowns.  Historically, holidays are tough on the boyz and more than a few have been memorable in a bad way. 

But that isn't to say that Christmas was "incident-free".  We were sitting at dinner and we heard a loud crash from the basement.  When we went down there, we discovered that Alan had toppled the old kitchen table we had sitting down there.  Naturally there was a recently watered plan on top of it and all our hats and gloves from the recent snow were scattered all over and it was all a HUGE mess.  Yuck.  When DH looked closer (he is good about that!) he discovered that one of the wires for our internet was down and mostly stripped.  Sigh.

This is our basement last year. On the right is the  climbing platform that DH built for Alan a few years ago.

Alan was thrilled that Dad had put the climbing bars back up!

Our basement is unfinished.  With the rate that Alan wrecks things, that always seemed the best route.  DH had covered most major duct work, piping and wiring with plywood to limit Alan's access but somehow the little sneak kept finding new things to wreck.  With both of us being engineers, we are way too practical to finish our basement ceiling with drywall (this gives you no access to critical stuff) and a drop ceiling is completely impractical since Alan would dismantle that faster than we could install it!

It was Joe's birthday but we kept the kid busy!

Of course, he is a typical boy -- playing with power tools is fun!

DH had a great idea and said "Let's cover the whole ceiling with plywood.  We can still take down sheets if we need access but it will be more uniform and block Alan's access to all the critical stuff."  He proposed this on Friday.  On Saturday we sketched out the basement and figured out how much lumber and plywood we would need and I went out to the hardware store to place the order.  We had plans all day Sunday.  The lumber showed up late Monday morning and by Wednesday evening we had 3/4 of the basement ceiling covered. 

All this in less than a week! 

Mostly done.  I like it.  It reminds me a bit of a cabin in the woods -- but that paneling has GOT to go!

I can never complain about DH being one of "those" husbands -- the kind that starts a million project and never finishes one, or worse, the kind that only dreams but never does any kind of home improvements.  It may not be a fancy basement -- far from it!  But it is useable, practical and mostly complete!

"You mean that happy child?"

Anyone who has watch the original Toy Story movie more than once (as most parents can claim) will get the title reference, but in case you live in a bubble, have girls or have just gone several years without seeing the fabulous, first Disney-Pixar collaboration, I will explain.

There is a scene where Sid, the horrible middle school boy next door, is plotting to blow up one of his toys and he is laughing maniacally at the destruction he is about to inflict.  The toys are trying to explain to newcomer Buzz Lightyear that Sid is basically the scourge of the neighborhood and Buzz sees him laughing through binoculars and asks, "You mean that happy child?"

Alan has the world's cutest giggle and frequently laughs to himself for no apparent reason.  That said, some times it takes on a bit of a maniacal quality that makes DH or I turn to the other and say, "You mean that happy child?"

I don't know if it is the fact that we recently put up the Christmas tree and Alan is excited about the holidays or if he is just outgrowing his meds or if it is because it has been too cold lately for him to go outside without shoes, but Alan has been incredibly moody lately.  One minute he is laughing maniacally and the next he is screaming and hitting and trying to climb on the fireplace mantle.  This past weekend I captured this period of giggles and an hour later he was in time out.  Sigh.

This kid will be the death of me!  I think it is time for me to go play with my minis.

Miss me?

Miss me?? 

Alan -- oh so ready for the cast to be off!!

I have been blissfully absent from blogging for most of the last month.

Most of you probably haven't noticed.  Many of you probably don't care.  Some of you will probably tell me how much you've missed hearing about my antics with the boyz.  Yes, they've had them.  No, I haven't written about them.

My miniature greenhouse (made from a birdcage) is almost done!

Mainly I've been taking time for me. 

Julie. 

Not "Mom" and certainly not "Mom of special needs kiddos". 

A little roombox called "Tea for Two"

Just Julie.

I've been working out -- most weeks at least 3 days!  Considering I only had my surgery 10 weeks ago and the boot has only been off for about 6 weeks, I think that is pretty awesome.  Some days my foot still hurts.  I can't do more than a lunge or two before I have tears in my eyes.  I can't genuflect in church without hanging on to the end of the pew and looking like a klutzy idiot (oh, wait, I AM a klutz -- but let's not discuss the idiot part!!)

Since I tend to like working out first thing after Alan gets on the bus and that was when I usually blogged as well, that has probably been the single biggest contributing factor to my decreased blogging.

the tea cart

I've even lost 3-5 pounds (depending on the day) which is only a tiny fraction of what I probably need to lose (20) but at least my weight is headed in the right direction for the first time in a long time.

A little Southwestern themed roombox I made

I have also been working on my miniatures a lot and have actually finished two projects in the last two weeks and almost finished with my third.  Considering only about 3 weeks ago I was close to having a panic attack that I had too much started and would never finish anything, that is pretty impressive.

Climbing again ...

Alan also got his cast off last Thursday.  He (and we) were pretty miserable for the 24 hours following the procedure (he had severe nausea from the anesthesia and then didn't sleep much that night) but my happy child is back.  He has even done some tree climbing since the cast came off although I think in some ways he misses having the indestructible protection on his arm.

Fat cat

As for Joe, he is still volunteering three days a week and spouting his little gems. 


Diesel is still fat and happy.

Life at the Sparks house is back to normal -- whatever that is!!!!