Joe-isms

Joe comes out with the funniest observations on life.  Mostly I've just shared them on my Facebook page and with family, but I decided to collect as many as I could remember and put them in a blog.

I was dressed all in purple one day and Joe told me that I "looked like a plum."  Since he likes plums, I think it was a compliment, but it is always fun to try to translate the autistic mind.

He told me earlier this year that he hoped if he had kids that they were more like him and not like Alan because "Alan is just work, work, work, work!"

Joe took one look at this house (across the street from Alan's camp) and said, "That is really unsafe.  Alan could NOT live there."  (In case you can't tell from the picture, there is a second floor door that opens to a porch roof and there are no handrails.)

Once Joe's homeroom teacher had been out sick for several days.  When she saw Joe on her first morning back she said, "I really missed you, Joe!"  His response?  "Well I managed to do just fine without you."  Luckily, she laughed and he amended it, "Well, I mean, it is good to have you back, too."

One night when we had Chinese for dinner and my fortune was something like "Your house will always have peace."  Needless to say, this gave DH and I quite a chuckle.  When we stopped laughing, Joe says, "That will never happen!" in a very matter of fact voice.  Another night there was no fortune in my fortune cookie and Joe decided that meant I was "unfortunate".

A few weeks ago, when I mentioned to Joe that I had a stomachache, he asked me if I thought "I might be getting pregnant."  (At that moment?!?!)

When I had a minor fender bender less than a year after totaling my previous car, Joe wanted to know if the new car survived.  (No query on me, I guess he figured I was walking and talking so I must be fine.)  When I told him that yes the car would be fine, it just needed a little repair, his response was, "Good.  Because I thought you were going through cars awfully fast."

Most parents try to prepare their child for the world.  I think I might have to prepare the world for my child!