Thursday, October 24, 2013

The jacket

Some days I just want to cry.  Why does everything have to be a battle? 

It is getting to be cold where I live and I've been trying to get Alan to wear his jacket to school this week. 

Monday and Tuesday I just asked him to put it on and he refused.

Yesterday he got physically aggressive with me (hitting and headbutting me) when I insisted he wear his jacket.  Finally I ended up putting the jacket in his backpack for them to try at school.  Of course, they didn't go out yesterday and the jacket came home in his backpack.

Yesterday afternoon I had the brilliant idea that if he wanted to go outside after school he would have to wear his jacket.  He opted to stay inside and just watch videos.

This morning I tried again.  He grabbed his harness for the bus and I told him I wouldn't put it on until after he put on his jacket.  So he put the jacket in his backpack.

To add insult to injury, he was wearing his jacket when we picked him up from camp Sunday afternoon and they didn't say anything about him resisting.  It obviously fits and there don't seem to be any sensory issues with the material.

I guess if school can't get him to wear it, I just let him be cold?  Truthfully, he is such a tough kiddo he probably isn't terribly cold although he was shivering waiting for the bus on Tuesday and Wednesday.

I'm tired, frustrated and out of ideas.


  1. Oh Julie. I am so sorry. It is so hard sometimes. I mean, it's a jacket for Pete's Sake!!! It seems like we have these battles that make absolutely no sense to anyone who isn't living through the war. Have you thought about asking the school to help you? Sending hugs

  2. I totally get this. Zeke has lived in his flannel PJ bottoms and a tee shirt for the last six years. Inside out and often back wards! Seems and tags just really get to him! Often in my blog pictures you can see him this way. I have stopped apologizing for it. We have a rule with him, that if we go to town he HAS to wear regular clothing and right side out. But no matter what I have him wear he pulls at it and itches the whole time we are out and changes usually, as soon as he gets home. Sigh. My husband and I have been building up this big day next month when he will turn 12. Telling him he really needs to start wearing regular clothing daily and right side out daily when he turns 12. We shall see. But I doubt he is going to fall for it. Fact is he just does not like cloths much at all. I get less frustrated with him when he tries to tell me how the seams and tags feel against his skin. The sensory input is just way over the top for him. Bless his heart really. I bet having sleeves on Alans arms just feels bad to him. Change of weather was always hard for William when he was young. I mean major melt downs when going from shorts to long pants and then back again. One year he got used to wearing a hoodie and would hardly take it off or take the hood down in the house. He just got so used to the hoddie on and the hood up. I think it muffed sounds to a bit for him so it was a struggle for me to get it away the next summer. I get it and am sorry. I know what a daily struggle it can be. Don't worry about what others will think. They just don't understand. I once had someone tell me to make them do it. Yeah, you go ahead and try...Its not that easy...they go into fright or flight! I pray you find a solution but often with my two sons it is just them getting slowly used to something in their own time and on their own terms. Praying for you!