Wednesday, April 16, 2014

Close enough to walk

Where do I start?  It has been forever since I've blogged. 

Mainly I have spent the last month babysitting contractors working in our kitchen.  No, I don't have to sit there and watch them, but being on site helps prevent all sorts of problems and hiccups.  That said, today is supposed to be our final inspection and then the great kitchen project should be complete.  As soon as it gets painted, I plan to devote an entire blog post to the kitchen, but right now it is only functional, not pretty -- and I want pretty pictures. 

I am also having a bit of a "creativity crisis".  I haven't worked on my minis in ages, I haven't done any scrapbooking, I sure haven't done any cooking and I obviously haven't done much in the way of blogging.  I've been reading and playing computer games.  Ugh.

Weekend before last Joe and I went to DC.  Again, I feel like I should do an entire post just to highlight our trip.  It was a lot of fun, and I want to do it justice.  But that isn't what is on my mind this morning either.

Today, I am stressing over people that don't get it.

DH and I were talking this morning about an unexpected offer to watch Alan.  I won't shame this person by identification, but I think it is safe to say that the qualifications are not there.

While it is true that we don't have frequent meltdowns, we do make a lot of daily accommodations -- many unconsciously.  When we were forced to write out specific directions recently for a babysitter, it was amazing the number of things we did differently from each other and yet consistently the same.  Those routines are incredibly important to Alan.  Yes, they have to change sometimes, but we just do it.  So many things that we've learned over the years we do without agonizing over it. 

When someone thinks that we've got it under control or they could do what we do without much training, it is sort of insulting.  Many days feel like we are engaged in guerrilla warfare.  I am emotionally exhausted most nights.

I just wish people would cut me some slack when I don't do what everyone else does.  It isn't just a matter of finding a babysitter -- it is a matter of finding a reliable, adaptable, comfortable, trustworthy, flexible person who has some autism training. 

They sure aren't around every corner!

12 comments:

  1. I know how you feel. It ticks me off when people think we should just treat our kids like typical kids. Like we are somehow spoiling them or not being tough enough on them! I can't wait to see your new kitchen!

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    1. Thanks, Sylvia! Apparently writing this blog entry was sort of therapeutic for me as I now feel brimming with creativity! :-)

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  2. Wait a minute...you cannot just call the 12 year old down the street and have her babysit? you helicopter mom you. OH MY FRIEND I feel you. It is crazy, just crazy how while I am sure your friend had the best of intentions it takes that moment to realize that they just do not understand. That it isn't that simple or easy.

    And it breaks your heart because you wish it were. Sending creative hugs your way

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    1. Thanks, Kerri! Have a Happy Easter, too!

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  3. Found you on "Love That Max".......and I couldn't agree more! I get most annoyed that friends are always telling me, you and your hubs should go away for a weekend, just the two of you. Well if you don't have family around and there really isn't someone you trust, how do you manage that? Some people just don't get it at all.

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    1. Thanks, Stephanie. Yes, I would love to go away for a weekend with just my hubby. It doesn't happen. I have to settle for date nights and a sense of humor! :-)

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  4. I totally get the emotional exhaustion and it is mainly my child on the spectrum that affects this - it's not the same as other special needs. I know this more than most people xx

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    1. Thanks, LfBS! I'm sure you do get it! :-)

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  5. I totally get it. Every time we try leaving certain of our children with sitters, even with detailed instructions, we have major fallout for days! It just isn't worth tying to clean up the emotional mess. Can't wait to see your kitchen! So exciting!

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    1. It should be painted this week and then I will certainly post pics. Take care of all your little ones and may they all stay healthy. Happy Easter!

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  6. Found you on "Love that Max" link up and can't wait to read more. I go out with my best friend, Charmaine, who has multiple disabilities but that is because I am also a carer. It is not just as easy as her being able to "go out with friends". All the situations have to be adapted. It's the name of the game! Can't wait to read more....
    ~She Types Things

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    1. Thanks. I look forward to more of your posts as well. :-)

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